In a New York Times opinion piece, Nassau County Executive Tom Suozzi underscores a distinction with a major difference in the debate over marriage equality: same-sex couples are asking for civil marriage, not holy matrimony, and they deserve the right.

Many civil marriages are not considered “holy matrimony” by religious institutions because they do not conform to the rules of the religious institution. Those marriages have not challenged religious liberty. We must see that civil marriage, which has always been separate from religious marriage, will remain so.

But most important, gays and lesbians have suffered too long from legal discrimination, social marginalization and even violence. They are entitled to clear recognition of their equal status as citizens of a country that is founded on the principle that we are all inherently worthy. By delivering a clear message that same-sex couples can no longer be treated as separate and unequal in New York, we will also reduce discrimination in everyday life. We will all be better for that.

While religious institutions may not believe theologically in marrying same-sex couples, their practice of religion would be in no way affected by expanding the civil right to marriage to gay and lesbian New Yorkers.

Often forgotten in the debate over marriage rights are the rights of the children of same-sex couples–and the protections that come from having their parents married under the law. Susan Salomone of Syracuse speaks out about what marriage means to her family and children.

“It’s really a protection for our family,” Susan Salomone said about the prospect of gay marriage in New York. “Jean and I have wills and other protections. But it’s so important for us to be able to protect the kids. … We’ve been together so long. We’ve established our relationship amongst our friends, our family, our church. It would be nice to have it legalized, so we’re completely protected.”

You, too can join the conversation and tell others what marriage means to you! (Continue reading this entry…)

In an editorial, the Tonawanda News takes the rhetoric out of the debate over marriage equality and breaks it down to the basics–the rights of couples and their children.

Too quickly this debate is moved from the arena of public policy into one fought on religious grounds. Paterson and state lawmakers are not religious leaders, and those who support the measure do not seek to weaken those religious institutions that stand in opposition.

This is a legal question — a debate over public policy, and whether our laws treat all New Yorkers fairly. They don’t.

If justice is truly blind, then surely gay people deserve the same legal protections as straight people. Rights like hospital visitation, joint tax filings and child adoption are granted to some in our state, but not all. That is the very definition of injustice.

If your religious beliefs are offended, we would question why. Your church will never be legally obligated to perform, or even recognize, homosexual marriages if it doesn’t want to.

Four states now allow gay marriage and none have been besieged by plagues or fallen into the sea. Indeed, it’s been the opposite. States that have allowed gay marriage see a drop in divorce rates. More children have loving homes.

If you’re a New Yorker, then join the conversation and tell others what marriage means to you!

Senate Majority Leader Malcolm Smith understands that religious opinions about marriage should have no bearing on how the government approaches the issue of marriage equality.

“I look at it as a legal matter… People being together, you know, has no implication on most other people’s lives,” he said. “I think people deserve to be with who they want to be with. Who am I to dictate?”

No religion should have a monopoly on the institutions of government or on the right to marry.

Lisa Golden of New York City tells us what marriage means to her personally…

“Marriage equality is a basic matter of rights. Marriage is about the right to pursue happiness and the fundamental right to liberty.

“Marriages should be legally recognized by the state, even if religious institutions may not recognize them.

“As a mother, I want my daughters to grow up in a State where everyone will be free from discrimination and have the right to marry, regardless of their sexual orientation.

“I think our society is more enlightened than ever before in history and is more comfortable with the idea of marriage equality, especially in a state such as New York, which values liberty and freedom.”